A grateful heart - one of the biggest blessing you could have in this world. Life is already hard as it is supposed to be, but it's hell to go through without a grateful heart.
Qalban shaakira, a heart that is always thankful of His blessings. More precisely, a heart that is able to see blessings through the hardship and calamities, and be thankful for it. Or even it fails to see the the silver lining, it still believes without a doubt that there is not a single loophole in His plans ever, and so the heart is grateful for that- for everything that it gets or does not get.
We can utter so much about believing in Allah, but only the heart can feel the sweetness of it.
The peace.
The acceptance.
The contentment.
For the car and ability to maintain it, using it to visit our dad, aunties, brother, sister in-law, nephew and nieces. To be at their service and run errands for them, seek advise and spend time together after reconciled- the peace in the relationship we have right now after long years of unsettled chaos in the family. The safe journey back and forth to work and returning home. Anything fatal could have happen if He wills, but nothing ever did. Thank you Allah for the protection on the days that we drive in a half-awake state. Exhausted and tired. You always keep us safe on the road.
For the comfy home with mom and our sisters. The difficult conversations and the misunderstandings, but the religious reminders and congregational prayers, crazy stories about schools, hysterical laugh and silly acts, the funny faces we make, the jokes and teasing, the home cooked meal. It's the life we have been wishing since we were a little girl. We are growing such a strong bond with our family throughout this year. Thank you Allah for the love and compassion You bestowed upon your slaves. We own nothing, not even our minds and hearts. If it's not Your mercy, our hearts will continue to divide.
For the good friends and companies we have. The kind people who keep coming in our life and assist our way, guiding us, and making life a little more colourful. Sending us funny memes and stickers, checking on us if we're doing good since we stayed away from social medias. Those who always remind us of Allah, to take care of ourselves, who stay on rainy days to cry together and celebrate the sunny days with happiness and love.
For the job of teaching Your religion to the children and young ummah of the Prophet (peace be upon him). The highest honour we do not deserve as a sinner that we are, but Allah grants us with it as He is the God who loves to give and forgive. He has chosen us as the mediator and the intercessor. Our presence are a part of the sustenance bestowed upon the children in acquiring the knowledge about Allah and His religion, His messenger sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam, and the salafus soleh. Our job carry such honourable responsibilities, and He knows we are capable of it. We could not be more blessed than this. And which of the favour of your Lord will you deny?
For the unique abilities, profound qualities, and strong characteristics we manifest. The modesty in dressing and guarding our chastity- we once went through the darkest days where we lost the way, but He found us lost and guided us. The resilience in holding on to our faith and practicing our religion, the willpower to bounce back and work on our mind and soul after the hard fall, the terrible crash. He never left. Not once. He guided us through and borrowed us the strength. He granted us patience to fight our nafs and break the chain of transgression.
Now we are stable, stronger than ever under His will. The strong social skills and boundaries we manifest at workplace, the boldness and courage in our way of writing and sending those emails, requesting those meetings, and commenting on unresolved issues. Criticism on the mistakes were not taken personally, people's unnecessary rudeness and judgement was shoved off, anxiety phases were well managed. Concurrently, the warmth we show to our colleagues and students, the interesting and engaging lessons we run, the jokes we cracked which made everyone laughs, the awkward moments we embraced and let go. We did not carry the burden in our mind for two weeks. Everyday is a new day. It felt.. liberating. It really does. Alhamdulillah.
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